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From Video to DVD
http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,1895,1892657,00.asp
MY SPACE : A Must Read for All who have children or grandchildren
After
tossing her books on the sofa, she decided to grab a snack and get on-line . She
logged on under her screen name ByAngel213. She checked her Buddy List and saw
GoTo123 was on. She sent him an instant message: ByAngel213: Hi. I'm glad you
are on! I thought someone was following me home today. It was really weird!
GoTo123: LOL You watch too much TV. Why would someone be following you? Don't
you live in a safe neighborhood? ByAngel213: Of course I do. LOL I guess it was
my imagination cuz' I didn't see anybody when I looked out. GoTo123: Unless you
gave your name out on-line. You haven't done that have you? ByAngel213: Of
course not. I'm not stupid you know. GoTo123: Did you have a softball game after
school today? ByAngel213: Yes and we won!! GoTo123: That's great! Who did you
play? ByAngel213:We played the Hornets. LOL. Their uniforms are so gross! They
look like bees. LOL GoTo123:What is your team called? ByAngel213:We are the
Canton Cats. We have tiger paws on our uniforms. They are really cool. GoTo123:
Did you pitch? ByAngel213:No I play second base. I got to go. My homework has to
be done before my parents get home. I don't want them mad at me. Bye!
GoTo123:Catch you later. Bye Meanwhile.......GoTo123 went to the member menu and
began to search for her profile. When it came up, he highlighted it and printed
it out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he knew about Angel so
far. Her name: ShannonBirthday: Jan. 3, 1985Age: 13State where she lived: North
Carolina Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall. Besides this
information, he knew she lived in Canton because she had just told him. He knew
she stayed by herself until 6:30 p.m. every afternoon until her parents came
home from work. He knew she played softball on Thursday afternoons on the school
team, and the team was named the Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed
on her jersey. He knew she was in the eighth grade at the Canton Junior High
School . She had told him all this in the conversations they had on- line. He
had enough information to find her now. Shannon didn't tell her parents about
the incident on the way home from the ballpark that day. She didn't want them to
make a scene and stop her from walking home from the softball games. Parents
were always overreacting and hers were the worst. It made her wish she was not
an only child. Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her parents wouldn't be so
overprotective. By Thursday, Shannon had forgotten about the footsteps following
her. Her game was in full swing when suddenly she felt someone staring at her.
It was then that the memory came back. She glanced up from her second base
position to see a man watching her closely. He was leaning against the fence
behind first base and he smiled when she looked at him. He didn't look scary and
she quickly dismissed the sudden fear she had felt. After the game, he sat on a
bleacher while she talked to the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she
walked past him. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her name on the back
of her shirt. He knew he had found her. Quietly, he walked a safe distance
behind her. It was only a few blocks to Shannon's home, and once he saw where
she lived he quickly returned to the park to get his car.Now he had to wait. He
decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to Shannon 's house. He
drove to a fast food restaurant and sat there until time to make his move.
Shannon was in her room later that evening when she heard voices in the living
room. 'Shannon, come here,' her father called. He sounded upset and she couldn't
imagine why. She went into the room to see the man from the ballpark sitting on
the sofa. 'Sit down,' her father began, 'this man has just told us a most
interesting story about you.' Shannon sat back. How could he tell her parents
anything? She had never seen him before today! 'Do you know who I am, Shannon ?'
the man asked. 'No,' Shannon answered. 'I am a police officer and your online
friend, GoTo123.' Shannon was stunned. 'That's impossible! GoTo is a kid my age!
He's
14. And he lives in Michigan !' The man smiled. 'I know I told you all that, but
it wasn't true. You see, Shannon , there are people on-line who pretend to be
kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to injure kids and hurt them, I
belong to a group of parents who do it to protect kids from predators. I came
here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is to talk to people on-line. You
told me enough about yourself to make it easy for me to find you. You named the
school you went to, the name of your ball team and the position you played. The
number and name on your jersey just made finding you a breeze.' Shannon was
stunned. 'You mean you don't live in Michigan ?' He laughed. 'No, I live in
Raleigh . It made you feel safe to think I was so far away, didn't it?' She
nodded.'I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she wasn't as lucky.
The guy found her and murdered her while she was home alone. Kids are taught not
to tell anyone when they are alone, yet they do it all the time on-line. The
wrong people trick you into giving out information a little here and there
on-line. Before you know it, you have told them enough for them to find you
without even realizing you have done it. I hope you've learned a lesson from
this and won't do it again. Tell others about this so they will be safe too?'
'It's a promise!' That night Shannon and her Dad and Mom all knelt down together
and thanked God for protecting Shannon from what could have been a tragic
situation. *****NOW***** Please send this to as many people as you can to teach
them not to give any information about themselves. This world we live in today
is too dangerous to even give out your age, let alone anything else.EVEN FORWARD
THIS TO PEOPLE WITHOUT KIDS SO THEY CAN SEND IT TO FRIENDS THAT DO HAVE CHILDREN
OR GRANDCHILDREN.
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I have been thinking about winners and
losers. When a person receives an apology is he a winner? I don't
think so. Both parties have lost because of the disagreement or conflict. It
would have been better had there been no need for an apology. When an
apology is sincerely given there are a variety of responses. The best is
when the offended person graciously acknowledges the apology, recognizing
the sincere effort of the other to correct an injustice. Another
reaction is found in a gloating, "I told you so" attitude with the offended
one feeling the satisfaction of victory. A third reaction would be no
reaction at all. In the first instance both parties can feel satisfied that
there is a peaceful outcome and a new beginning. The second reaction could
be a deterrent to the offender in ever apologizing again but at least having
the knowledge that the wrong has been corrected. In the final case, the
original offender is left with the impression that his efforts to correct
the problem have either fallen short or that the offended one prefers
to remain offended. I hope that if I am offended and receive an apology that
I would be gracious enough to accept it and acknowledge my acceptance in a
spirit of common courtesy, if not genuine gratitude. Just thinking.
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"They're
never offended,
because their ego isn't involved with their opinions."
--Dr. Wayne W. Dyer
Speaking of people who are connected to their source (God).
Who are we?
We are Christians of many denominations and sub-denominations. We are Jews. We are Moslems - Sunnī and Shīites. We are Hindu, Buddhist, and of hundreds of other beliefs including none at all. And within our denominations we chose to call ourselves traditionalists, moderates, reformists, and progressives. For the most part, we believe in a god or gods who created the universe with everything and everyone in it.
We have searched for the purpose and meaning of life. We have attempted to define our creator and discover his intentions for us. But we have been led astray in this quest by our own egos. We have assumed that God is ego driven as we are and when we are confronted by God's reality we do not understand. Each religious group in their egotism believes that they alone know God.
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How Smart Is Your Right Foot? Bob Clarke
This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And you will keep trying
it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot. But you
can't!!!
1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and
make clockwise circles with it.
2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right
hand. Your foot will change direction!!!
I told you so... And there is nothing you can do about it.
Make sure you pass this on to your friends... They won't be able to believe it
either!!!
**********************************
Diane
Some of these are really great.
*Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have? Customer: A white one...*
******* Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.*
*Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?*
*Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.*
*Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note .."*
*Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet.. it's still on my desk... Sorry...*
********
*Helpdesk: Click on the "my computer'"icon on the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left?*
********
*Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Male customer: Hello... I can't print.*
*Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and...*
*Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates!*
********
*Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can't find it...*
********
*Customer: I have problems printing in red... Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?*
*Customer: Aaaah..................Thank you.*
********
*Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.*
********
*Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore. Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?*
*Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer*
*Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.*
*Customer: Okay.*
*Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?*
*Customer: Yes.*
*Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?*
*Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah..that one does work!*
********
*Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, and the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?*
********
*A customer couldn't get on the Internet: Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?*
*Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.*
*Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?*
*Customer: Five stars.*
********
*Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape.*
*Helpdesk: That's not an anti-virus program.*
*Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.*
********
*Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!*
*
********
*And the winner is...*
*Helpdesk: How may I help you? Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.*
*Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?*
*Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?*
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http://www.hatrack.com/svu/tolkien_lewis/
It is the heart which experiences God, not the reason.
~ Blaise Pascal
Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings.
~ Samuel Johnson
-- English proverb
"If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a
nation gone under." - Ronald Reagan
“Preach the gospel daily, if necessary use words.”
Francis of Assisi
“To have found God is not an end in itself but a beginning.”
Franz Rosenweig
More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of.
Tennyson
One who gives charity in secret is greater than Moses.
The Talmud
With God, all things are possible.
Proverbs
For where you are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of you.
St. Matthew
If we keep on doing what we’ve always done we’re going to keep on getting what
we’ve
always gotten.
(Dr. John Maxwell)
Everything in life I ever did that was worthwhile I caught hell for.
(Harry Truman)
A little revolution now and then is a good thing. (Thomas Jefferson)
Only those who are willing to risk going too far will ever know how far they can
go.
(T.S. Elliott)
The ultimate measure of man is not where you stand during times of comfort
and convenience, but where you stand during times of challenge
and controversy. (Dr. Martin Luther King)
Use whatever language you will, but you can never say more
than what you are. (Emerson)
There is no progress without some struggle! (Frederick Douglass)
Tell them I did the best I could with what I had. (Thurgood Marshall)
A great man shows his greatness, by how he treats lesser men. (Carlisle)
Before we can move the world, we must first move ourselves. (Socrates)
What you do unto the least of thee, you do unto me. (The Bible)
Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing. (Helen Keller)
You never give up. Never. Never give up. (Winston Churchill)
We must learn to live together as brothers, or perish together as fools.
(Dr. Martin Luther King)
The human personality is like a charioteer with two headstrong horses,
each one seeking to go in opposite directions. (Plato)
The best time to do something worthwhile is between yesterday and tomorrow.
To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan,
but also believe. (Anatole France)
No one has ever measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold. (Zelda
Fitzgerald)
Love is the only force capable of turning an enemy into a friend? (Martin Luther
King)
It is the habit of making sacrifices in small things that enables us for making
them in great, when it is asked of us. Anthony W. Thorold
Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.
Helen Keller
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"When
we all see God in each other,
we will love one another as He loves us all.
That is the fulfillment of the law, to love one another. . .
We must know that we have been created for greater things,
not just to be a number in the world,
not just to go for diplomas and degrees, this work and that work.
We have been created in order to love and to be loved."
~ Mother Teresa
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http://www.quotationspage.com/subjects/dreams/
Graham's
Homepage
http://www.weeks-g.dircon.co.uk/index.html
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Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have
a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots of time with HIM/HER.
9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county, to
a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. I love
you, my special friend.
11. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second time.
My weight is perfect for my height -- which varies.
5. Always drink upstream from the herd.
10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to
make sure it's still there.
11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
12.
Wisdom from Grandpa......
On anniversaries, the wise husband always forgets the past - but never the present.A foolish husband says to his wife, "Honey, you stick to the washin', ironin', cookin' and scrubbin'. No wife of mine is gonna "work"."
Many girls like to marry a military man - he can cook, sew, and make beds and is in good health, and he's already used to taking orders.
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
You know you are getting old, when everything either dries up or leaks.Have a GREAT day.......and keep Laughing!
It's good for the soul.
And remember my motto;Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arrivingSafely in an attractive and well preserved body.But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand,Diet Coke in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming"WOO HOO what a ride!"
Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of
Algebra.
Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such
a nice change from being young.
Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Tenth ~ Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called
witchcraft. Today it's called golf
And finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to
laugh at when you are old.
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1.
The most powerful force in the universe is gossip.
2. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender,
religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we
ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
3. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you
to share yours with them.
5. The main accomplishment of almost all organized protests is to annoy people
who are not in them.
6.
7.
8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who
perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual
is crazy.
9. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth
it.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.
SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.
WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.
* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't
have a leg to stand on.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
8. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
9. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it
considered a hostage situation?
11. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it
all?"
12. What do you do when you see an endangered animal
eating an endangered plant?
13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his
wages?
14. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
17. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
18. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain
silent?
20. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those
yellow road signs?
24. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy
adultery?
25. How is it possible to have a civil war?
@#&%$!!!# ????
26. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest
drown, too?
27. If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
30. Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids"
instead of "asteroids"?
31. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at
them?
32. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
33. If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times
does he become disoriented?
34.
Alex K
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Aspire to inspire before you expire.
~~~~~
I LOVE THIS NEXT ONE!
My wife and I had words,
But I didn't get to use mine.
~~~~~
Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.
~~~~~
Blessed are those who can give without remembering
And take without forgetting.
~~~~~
The irony of life is that, by the time
You're old enough to know your way
Around, you're not going anywhere.
~~~~~
God made man before woman so as to give him time to think
Of an answer for her first question.
~~~~~
Don't
sell your mule to buy a plow.
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I have no answers.....
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"...but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but your ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America? Not the Governor's race in CA.
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
and finally... Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Your fences need to be
horse-high, pig-tight and bull-strong.
* Keep skunks, bankers and lawyers at a distance.
*
* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.
*
* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.
*
* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.
* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.
* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.
* Don't judge folks by their relatives.
* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
* .
* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.
*
* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.
* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you
from the mirror every mornin'.
* Always drink upstream from the herd.
* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.
* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin'
somebody else's dog around.
I used to eat a lot of
natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
I am in shape. Round is a shape.
************************* Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy
beautician.
*************************** Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels
good.
***************** ********** Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand. ***
*************************** An optimist thinks this is the best possible world.
A pessimist fears this is true.
************************** There will always be death and taxes; However, death
doesn't get worse every year.
*************************** In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
*************************** I am a nutritional overachiever.
*************************** I plan on living forever. So far, so good.
*************************** Practice safe eating -- always use condiments.
*************************** A day without sunshine is like night.
*************************** It's frustrating when you know all the answers, But
nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
***************************
*************************** Brain cells come and brain cells go, But fat cells
live forever.
*************************** Age doesn't always bring wisdom. Sometimes it comes
alone.
*************************** Life not only begins at forty, It also begins to
show.
******************* ******* I smile because I am your friend!
I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it.
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Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
A short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
A thief fell into wet cement, becoming a hardened criminal.
We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.
A math professor went nuts with the blackboard. He did a number on it.
A professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
Dead batteries were given out free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway)
A backward poet writes inverse.
In democracy your vote counts; in feudalism, your Count votes.
A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.
With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.
Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A -flat miner.
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
A grenade fell on a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.
You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.
His photographic memory was never developed.
He who get too big for britches will be exposed in the end.
When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture: a jab well done!
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1. There was a church that had problems with outsiders parking in its parking lots, so they put up a sign: CHURCH CAR PARK - FOR MEMBERS ONLY Trespassers will be baptized!
2. "No God - No Peace. Know God - Know Peace."
3. "Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!"
4. "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin Robbins."
5. "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"
6. An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets."
7. When the restaurant next to another Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."
8. "People are like tea bags -- you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are."
9. "Fight truth decay -- study the Bible daily."
10. "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Nonsmoking?"
11. "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives"
12. "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."
13. "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."
14. "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."
15. "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."
16. "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again."
17. "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon."
18. "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" (U R)
19. "In the dark? Follow the Son."
20. "Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up."
21. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."
In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his
wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb"
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Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen
Only...Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English
language.
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The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and
Wilma Flintstone.
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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S.Treasury.
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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
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Coca-Cola was originally green.
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It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
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The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...)
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The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
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The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
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The average number of people airborne over the U.S. in any given hour: 61,000
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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air,
the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person
died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on
the ground, the person died of natural causes.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock
and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature
wasn't added until 5 years later.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name
requested?
A. Obsession
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you
would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser
printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day of the year?
A. Father's Day
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes When you
pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on.
Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after
the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he
could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based,
this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England, when
customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them "Mind your pints and
quarts, and settle down."
It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or
handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle
to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~
Don't delete this just because it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can read
it.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde
Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the
ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat
ltteer be in the rghit
plae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the
wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?
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**************************************************************************
*****************************************************
PUNS - PUNS - PUNS - PUNS - PUNS - PUNS - PUNS -
-------------------------------------------------------
****************************
*****************************************************
How I Became Grandpa Don - Notes
| 9 | A Time of Surprises | 1962 - 1963 |
| 10 | Years of Growth and Change | 1963 - 1969 |
| 11 | The Tumultuous Times | 1970 - 1975 |
| 12 | For Better or For Worse | 1976 - 1977 |
| 13 | Lift Up Your Heart | 1978 - 1982 |
| 14 | A Perilous Voyage | 1983 - 85 |
| 15 | Born Again | 1986 - 1990 |
| 15a | Canticle | |
| 16 |
Pre-Retirement ??? (Publish fall 2004 - I hope) |
1990 - 1996 |
| 17 |
Retirement - The Golden Years (Publish Spring 2005) |
1996 - 2000 |
| 18 |
Grandpa's Guardian Angel Garden (Publish fall 2005) |
2000 - 2005 |
http://timelines.ws/20thcent/TWENTIETHCENT.HTML
**************************************************************
Sept. 21, 1996 Audeen Snyder died
97 Meds for Diabetes
May 14, 1997 Uncle Pete Wagner died
May 19, 1998 My Bypass
1999 Prostate biopsy Negative
1999 April Deacon Joe died
Nov 1999 PPC
July 17, 2000 - Anne Born to Eternal Life
Fr Homa leaves - Final Bulletin Article 10/1/00
Feb 2001 Fr Lanza arrives
June 2001 Anthony accepted to EU - Drafted by Minnesota Twins.
2001
Pool only used about 6 times
Maple tree planted East of patio, swing moved to east fence line & blue
spruce transplanted.
Gift of Angel from Dan & Karen
Aug 2001 Anthony started at Evansville U
Spring
2002; Pool removed. Grandpa's garden started. Gazebo installed two more maple
trees. Angel moved to garden.
In the spring of 2002
5/19/2002 Dom Grad Valpo
Christmas 2002; Tom & Diane gave me the sun dial. It stayed in living room 'till spring.
December 2002 Dom engaged to Sarah
Jan, 2003 Anthony switched to FAU
Spring
2003; Bought 2nd angel & ferry.
Added pear tree in yard
Summer 2003 Garden Angels live here added. Albano's gave me the naked Angel
Aug 2003 Marc at Moraine Valley
Sept 2003 Prostate biopsy Negative
Aug 12,2004 Dominick & Sarah move in with grandpa.
Aug 2004 Nick started SIU
*********************************************
Hi there,Thanks so much for signing my Guest Book! New things are being added all the time, so please come back and visit again soon!<A HREF="http://Calskp.50megs.com/">Calskp's "VIRTUAL VACATION"</A>
Graham's
Homepage
http://www.weeks-g.dircon.co.uk/index.html
*****************************************************
How Could I Go Back?
I am asked, In the light of the current priest pedophile scandal in
the church, have I decided to remain a Catholic and why? Until the question
was asked, it didn’t occur to me that a choice was needed, and so, I remain a
Catholic.
I am a ‘cradle Catholic’, born and raised in the
faith. I am a product of Catholic grade schools and a Catholic high school, a
former alter boy in a time when the Mass was celebrated in Latin and the alter
boys responded for the congregation of people who ‘attended’ Mass. But after
high school the church could not answer my questions. There was no logic in it.
I’m not referring to the Gospel message. I knew little of that. I am talking
about rules and regulations. My doubts in that regard led me to question the
existence of God.
When, after many years and the influence of many
people, Catholic and non-Catholic, I rediscovered God and found my own
spirituality, I was already a Catholic in name and I had been ‘attending’
Mass. I found myself in a new parish, a parish populated with welcoming
Christians, dedicated to their faith and full of love for everyone. I finally
realized that the church was its members, not the institution. I was absorbed
into their midst and became one of them, or rather, part of them. I consider
myself to be what I call a ‘born again’ Catholic and I found myself participating
at Mass, not just ‘attending’. I now go to Mass because I want to be there
and feel a need to be there. I am
enriched by our parish liturgies and supported by my parish family.
Donald J Plefka,
Orland Park, Illinois
The World of Grandpa Don www.plefka.net
I am having the time of my life right
now.
No, I’m not going to wild parties or traveling to exotic places. That never was ‘my thing’. I am living in the home that Anne and I built eighteen years ago, close to my family, friends and church and I have a feeling of contentment and being right with the world.
I do not want to be young again. I have no desire to make all those mistakes again and re-experience the “growth” period of my life. Some think that if they had their life to live over, they would avoid the mistakes. But, … there would be others in their place. Besides, I would not want to change anything because to do so would change the outcome and my life would not be the same.
Anne and I were gifted with three children whose marriage partners have become as our children. We were further gifted with nine grandchildren, our legacy and our pride.
During much of my working years, I had many doubts about God and religion. I was immersed in my work almost to the exclusion of everything and everyone else and I tried to convince everyone, including myself, that it was for my family. I loved my work.
During the years that our children were growing up Anne kept our focus on them. She stayed at home and raised them while I worked two jobs or extra hours. Our travels were limited to short trips to the boy’s baseball tournaments. Of traveling, Anne said that if she didn’t have it at least as good as at home, it was no vacation. Our funds went into making our home into the place where we wanted to be. Later we took a few vacations and we enjoyed the company’s annual management meetings in Tucson, Palm Springs or similar places. During these trips we enjoyed. “Living in the manner to which we would like to become accustomed”. (A favorite saying of a former president of the company.)
By the time I retired, our home was our personal retirement resort. Anne and I had both discovered that spirituality was not a far off supernatural thing but an integral part of human life. We both became very active in our church. After five years of retirement and a few days before a planned trip for our forty-fifth anniversary, Anne succumbed to a sudden heart attack. This was 14 years after her first heart attack and by-pass surgery. Anne and I often thanked God for these wonderful years.
I now realize I had been well prepared for her loss. We had often joked about “who would go first” and we were both content that our lives had been good and fruitful. Because of Anne’s health problems including the side effects of diabetes, I had been in training, helping with the laundry and other things. We had started using a cleaning service every other week and I have continued that along with a lawn maintenance service. So, after Anne’s death, when a neighbor asked if I was going to put the house up for sale, I replied, “No, my kids are going to do that after they carry me out”.
In addition to being very active in lay ministry at church I had started a web site for the parish. It is something I enjoy and it is a worthwhile hobby. I spend several hours a week updating that web site.
After Anne’s death I realized that there were many things that my grandchildren, and others, did not know about us. I also felt that I had things of value that I wanted to tell them. I started a web site of my own. The site, The World of Grandpa Don, has become a weekly newsletter, a family history, and a place where I encourage my grandchildren by recording their accomplishments. It contains my thoughts and beliefs and is, I hope, a witness to the actions of God in our lives.
My purpose in life at this time is to assist my children and their families when I can, in any way I can. It is to present a positive example to my grandchildren and to encourage them to live with love, kindness and concern for their fellow man. I try to pass on my belief that we should not just show tolerance to those who differ from us; we should embrace the differences, and benefit from them. That, in my opinion, is what made the USA a successful nation. I hope that they will continue to learn that when you compete, you should compete with yourself in an effort to better yourself, but not at the expense of others. There is no need to diminish someone to build your self. It is more productive to bring others up with you thereby raising the level for all. My message to my grandchildren is to use their God given talents to the benefit of all God’s creation. We are not isolated individuals but part of a world community dependent on the abilities of each other. I encourage all, in relationships with others, to “ be nicer than you need to be”. These messages are there for any who visit my web pages.
Anne is no longer here and our parents are gone, as are many relatives and friends. I miss them, … but I celebrate having them as part of my life. I love my life, past and present, and have no fear of the future. I am having the time of my life right now endeavoring to show kindness to everyone I meet. I hope it is contagious.
Donald J Plefka
(Grandpa Don)
*********************************************************
It is so sad that there are those who deliberately cut
themselves off from family and friends. They are offended and feel they cannot
forgive the offense. I personally know of people who have carried grudges for
many years and who are miserable because they feel someone has offended them and
will not admit their wrong. There are those who will pre-judge a person based on
a perception that may or may not be correct and wonder why that person does not
like them.
"I tried to be nice to him/her, why am I treated this way?" is a
common statement. Actually the attempt to act nice was so transparent that it
would be impossible to react with anything but distrust. "I would forgive
them but they hate me." is often heard. And the worst statement is, "I
can never forgive them for what they did to me!"
I have read that we all are part of a universal consciousness which includes
everything in creation. A proponent of this belief is Wayne Dwyer who relates
that one of his daughters has such a love for all creation that butterflies are
attracted to her while they avoid others around her. They sense that she has
this love and she will not harm them. Animals often display the capability to
"know" when someone is good or evil and react accordingly. Dogs have
been used to warn people of imminent attacks of seizures. They somehow are aware
of a chemical imbalance in the person prior to the seizure.
I believe that we draw from, and contribute to, this universal consciousness
without being aware of doing so. Call it intuition if you will, but it is there.
Positive thoughts bring positive reactions and negative thoughts have negative
results. When we become more positive in our thinking, we exude love and trust.
As we become more positive, we become more aware of the universal consciousness
and less attracted to negative things such as greed and hate. We are said to be
at a higher level of consciousness. I believe that this is the greatest gift God
has provided in his creation.
It is also the greatest gift we can give to each other. Find something to like
about everyone you know. Concentrate on that facet of the person and build on
it. Make it the most important thing about him. He/she will FEEL your positive
thoughts and react positively to you. The effect will be accumulative and soon
the things you didn't like about each other will no longer be important. Always
build on the positive and diminish the negative. You will find yourself moving
to a higher level of consciousness and the higher you go, the easier it will be
to move even further.
Christmas celebrates the Birth of Jesus. He is said to be at the highest level
of consciousness of anyone in history. His message is that of love and
forgiveness. To follow Him is to spread His message to everyone we meet. It's a
one on one procedure. As it spreads from person to person the world will become
a better place. We are building the Kingdom of God. We can not do it unless
everybody helps.
*********************************
*********************************
*********************************************************
As you might suspect, there are Web standards. They are encouraged by
the World Wide Web Consortium (http://www.w3.org/), which has 450
member organizations. But browser manufacturers are free to ignore
those standards.
There are a number of sites on the Internet where you can test your
pages. The World Wide Web Consortium has one. Two others are offered
by the WDG HTML Validator and AnyBrowser.com. Those three sites are:
http://validator.w3.org/
http://www.htmlhelp.com/tools/validator/
http://www.anybrowser.com/validateit.html
The validators will tell you what problems the pages have with
various browsers. The more basic your pages, the more compatible they
will be, especially with older browsers. But that raises the question
of how far you should go to accommodate people who use obsolete or
unusual software.
I include a notice on each of my pages that they are optimized for
Internet Explorer 6. And I include a link on every page to IE6, which
is free. I suggest you do the same.
I recently wrote an article about building a Web page. It's here:
http://www.bcentral.com/articles/komando/117.asp
Warmly,
Kim :)
P.S.: Speaking of Web pages, I mentioned this once on the air and
I have been receiving e-mail asking more about it. Google automatically
takes a "snapshot" of each page it crawls and caches it. If you don't
want this, say if it is a personal or family Web site, add some simple
code. You can find information at:
http://www.google.com/webmasters/3.html#B2
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Senders email: feedback@htmlgear.com
Message:
I am currently reading Willard Scott's book "The Older the Fiddle, the Better the Tune" and just finished your essay. My husband of 44 years passed away in Feb. 2003 and I too have thought about writing a history for our children (3 daughters) and grandchildren (4 grandsons). There are so many things about me and my husband that they don't know. Your example has given me the impetus to get started. I, like you, am content with my life and do not wish to be young again. It's nice to have reached this stage of life in good health, to be able to relax and enjoy each day and not have the cares and worries of young parents. My faith in God is important to me and sees me through the rough spots. I thank God each day for his blessings. Best wishes. R.
************************************************
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Knowing You Are in Heaven
When you died,
It brought me tears of sadness.
But knowing you are in heaven
Brings me happiness.
I wish I could have seen you
One last time and said:
“I love you!”
It helps me knowing that
God is beside you.
I remember the times
We spent together,
And know my pain will soon get better.
Even though we are two worlds apart,
You will always have a piece of my heart.
Now the skies are blue,
No longer gray,
Because I know
We will meet again someday!
*************************
Smile
When you smile,
It can bring happiness to a room.
It can make whittled flowers
That died come back to life and bloom.
A smile can make
A young child’s tears wash away,
Make dark skies turn blue,
And let the sun brighten the day.
It can make the gates of heaven open
And let angels fly down to earth,
And lift the souls of those who have died.
A smile can make anger
Turn to happiness,
And war turn to peace.
So the next time you smile,
Just imagine what may happen!
Andrew Hall
71 BIGGS AVE., ANCASTER, ON., L9K 1R7, CANADA
**************
Live and Breathe
Hope can appear from a speck of dust
Through microscopic pieces of existence,
Like pebbles that are too small to be
Considered a stone without the act of thinking twice,
Or like a boy who is too young to be called a man.
A reason for change can come forth
In the innocence of simple eyes but yet so profound
That the reality of being a prisoner passes away
With every passionate regain of a lost breathe.
The best gift I ever received is when
You gave yourself to me without expecting
Anything except my love for you in return.
With my hands on your words they begin
To saturate through my skin making
Their way to the center of my chest,
Causing my mind to become full of poetic ramblings,
Which try to express the beauty of what you’ve done.
Depending on you is nowhere near a weakness
For you are the strength that I need to be who I am,
And I pray that the voices of disapproval will never,
Echo the sound of these words that are not meant
To remain on this paper as testimony of the present,
But rather a lifting of arms with these words tattooed,
Along the side of my wrist that are yours to peel off.
The reliance of living through the words you speak
Inspires me to capture even a modest comprehension
********************************
Splintered Into Salvation
Although you shut the door
In a clear sign of exclusion,
I can still hear the penetrating ringing in my ears
As you rinse your mouth out with lies.
Spitting them out into the sink
Causing the pipes to burst because
Of the foul taste on the end of
your lips.
In spawning this web of destruction,
You’ve become who I once was
Before I splintered into salvation.
With my hand pressed against the door ever so firmly
That it leaves an implantation of my palm.
My heart is transformed into a life saving rope
Created for you to pull yourself in.
My ears listen attentively as my mouth remains an instrument
That is incapable of playing music of a judgmental tune,
But I am always there to lead you to purifying waters
In the same way that my back will never turn on you.
Don’t let the distant surroundings begin to enclose on you
Like a pack of wolves in the presence of mouth watering nourishment.
Instead let the scenery continue to be simply a sight
That will not become an empty addiction or a love
That shows you no you inclination of sympathy.
Witnessing you walk out the door is
An irreplaceable memory that I hold as a dear possession
Because when the door opened,
The look of understanding in your eyes
Took away any resemblance of the taste
That was once on the end of your lips
The moment before you splintered into salvation.
*************************
Anthony
Anthony is my brother.
There is none like any other.
With his black hair,
Short and curled.
He brings joy to the world.
One year old and foot high,
He is such a great little guy.
Always happy, never sad.
Always loved by his Mom and Dad.
Never unaware.
Always smart.
Everyone loves him,
Right from the start.
There is none like any other.
I am lucky to have
Such a great little brother!
*********************************
Lead Me
Take my hand and lead me,
To a place I’ve never been before.
Show me the beauty of life,
And lead me away from sin.
I will follow Your light,
As long as You will lead me.
I will put my trust in You,
And know Your light
Will not deceive me.
So I will allow my eyes to be Yours.
Lead me through dark spaces,
And open the locked doors.
Lead me to where I can wish.
Lead me to where my dreams
Can come true.
I will be happy there
As long as I’m with You.
So take my hand and lead me.
To a place I’ve never been;
A place where I can win.
Andrew Hall*******************
Getting Older.......
Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly
widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied. "Two years older
than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth
going home, is it?
Reporters interviewing a 104-year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best
thing about being 104?" the reporter asked. She simply replied, "No peer
pressure."
The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.
I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new
knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes. I'm half blind, can't hear anything
quieter than a jet engine, take 40 different medications that make me dizzy,
winded, and subject to blackouts, have bouts with dementia. Have poor
circulation; hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't reme mber if I'm 85 or
92. Have lost all my friends But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.
I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's
permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an
aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and
perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was
over.
An elderly woman decided to prepare her will and told her preacher she had two
final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her
ashes scattered over Wal-Mart. "Wal-Mart?" the preacher exclaimed. "Why
Wal-Mart?" "Then I'll be sure my daughters visit me twice a week "
My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it
used to be.
Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.
It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.
These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."
Remember: You don't stop laughing because you grow old, You grow old because you
stop laughing.
--- THE SENILITY PRAYER : Grant me the senility to forget the people I never
liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to
tell the difference.
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